This is a self help guide to GO WORKOUT and don’t do crazy things like e-stalking your ex or watching a three-day marathon of the Real Housewives.
Should I Go Workout Today?
Well, to answer this “tricky” question, you should ask yourself the following 10 questions:
1. Do Your Pants Make Your Butt Look Big?
YES: Well, maybe it’s time to workout.
NO: Does your tiny tush need some pumping up?
YES: Well, it’s time for a glute workout.
NO: Lucky! Go show it off at the gym!
2. Do You Remember What You Ate 3 Days Ago For Lunch?
NO: Exercise fends off memory loss. Go workout and you’ll be able to remember!
YES: Great, you passed the pop quiz. Just in case it wasn’t healthy, GO WORKOUT!
3. Does Your Week Feel Too Routine And Predictable?
NO: Sounds like you need a little structure. How about planning to work out at the same time each day?
YES: Then shake it up by throwing in some exercise to bookend or break up your workday.
4. Do You Want To Look Good Naked?
NO: Good for you! You’re more than your looks. Let’s channel that convention-bucking energy into some strength-building exercise.
YES: Well, staring at this article isn’t going to help your case. GO WORKOUT!
5. Are You Tired?
YES: Well, then you should workout! Regular exercise can help you sleep better and for now, wake you up!
NO: Are you a lazy bum?
NO: No more excuses, we want to see your tush at the studio!
YES: Stop that! Exercise can make you feel more energized. GO WORKOUT!
6. Are You Breathing?
NO: Are you a liar?
NO: Yes, you are! Five penalty points equal a workout for you!
YES: Do you want to continue breathing?
YES: Exercise combats health conditions and diseases, which can help you live longer. Let’s GO WORKOUT!
NO: You sound depressed. Are you sad today?
NO: Stop being such a brat and playing these silly mind games! GO WORKOUT!
YES: You should workout and get some much-needed endorphins!
7. Are You In Need Of A New Party Trick?
NO: Sounds like you party a lot the… How about some exercise to flush toxins out of your body?
YES: Why not amaze your friends with a few clapping push ups? Better get training!
8. Are Your Legs Broken?
NO: Well, someone else’s are! You should go workout enough for both of you.
YES: Oh my! We’re so sorry! Take it easy…on your legs. Try doing arm exercises.
9. Do You Love Michelle Obama’s Arms?
YES: You should workout! Go get some Obama’s arms!
NO: You sound like a hater. GO WORKOUT; exercise can be an instant mood booster!
10. Are You Strapped For Time?
NO: What are you waiting for? GO WORKOUT!
YES: Well, did you have time to read this?
YES: Chances are you can squeeze in a workout too! Drop and give us 20!
NO: We beg to differ…
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