8. Jacob’s Ladder
As you may know, Jacob’s ladder is traditionally that rope ladder that hangs on the side of ships for Johnny Depp and mermaids with wavy hair to grab on to and try to climb. But when it comes to fitness, this is the name of a tool that seems just dangerous enough to compete with an actual pirate. Except not even a pirate would threaten to make you fall on your face every two seconds. This device is advertised as being a very effective cardio equipment. While this surely will help you break a sweat- trying not to plunge face-first into it, over and over, because of its broken-hamster-wheel-esque properties- it’s hardly what the doctor would recommend, unless you’d be taking fitness advice from your future plastic surgeon. It’s the type of equipment that would probably drive you mental, making you feel like Sisyphus going up and up the hill with no real purpose in sight. And really, it shares its name with a psychological horror film where “the ladder” was a drug used in war that kind of made people want to go on killing sprees. Coincidence? I think not.